his arms do hold me

his arms do hold me,
but not to keep me
safe or possessed or
protected

rather, to offer me
his warmth and to
share in some of
mine

-A

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Waxing Crescent

The weekend after the eclipse
there is a crescent moon above your head
that sinks behind the roof of the bar
as you talk with wild eyes about
how a full moon on the ocean
lights up the sea like day
even erasing the stars.

Like that flood of light you describe,
you are new to me
and you are shining into places
that have been in shadow for a while.

-L

flowing

sometimes, gratitude is a blanket
wrapped around my body
in the form of letters, these treasures
from my roadmap of life

but if i don’t consider from where i’ve come,
how can I move forward?
direction is only relative to a starting point

i think of the snowmelt
the freeze and thaw;
the process that leads to
flowing

and i can hear the wailing, always
as much in my own gut as the
graveyard nearby

but the strength of water suggests that
freezing and thawing are
a necessary part of life

that resilience is not weight,
but water,
flowing

-A

Terror

written a while ago, but (sadly) still relevant

I want to refuse to let the terror take me over,
but that is so hard to do
when every day on my morning commute I feel a tightness in my chest as the train starts moving,
and every weekend when I pass the White House I step a little faster to shorten the exposure.
I know I have to go on living like everything is normal,
but have you read the description of a nail bomb?
Have you thought about how intentional that is?
How those are meticulously created to inflict pain?
And maybe even kill?
I will never forget what it felt like when I woke up
with the dual knowledge that there was an attack in Brussels in the morning
and that my friend was flying out of Brussels that morning.
I eventually heard that she was okay,
but in those few hours I think I had a glimpse into the lives of
New Yorkers after 9/11,
the lives of my friends in Europe,
the lives of my fellow humans in some Middle Eastern
and Latin American
and African
and Asian
countries every damn day.
I still want to believe that it is love, not fear, that unites us,
but when I see presidential candidates portray their rivals’ wives as ugly,
and I hear world leaders say refugees need to go back to where they came from,
back to the violence
and the madness
and the fear,
I think:
maybe it is actually terror that unites us all now.

-L

 

between sleeping and waking

from your silent shadow, you wept
and weeping sustains
the cracked earth

not blood from death
only sacrifice
can carry the weight of
question or
purpose

in sleeping, we dream and
in dreaming, we collect
moments, fragments
undiscovered and unattainable

in waking, we smell and taste
and touch
but in dreaming,
we survive

August 13, 2017

my hair still smells like a campfire
falling over my face
as I sit here trying to identify
the same wildflowers you used yesterday
to show me how bees carry pollen on their feet

and I think we are just killing time
thumbing through the pages
as I read the description of touch-me-not
the proven antidote for Poison Ivy
learned in a book instead of an internet search

but we can’t camp out here forever
waiting for meteors
as heat lightning catches the clouds on fire –

the world is burning in Charlottesville today
and I don’t know how to answer for my skin

-L